Day 1 for me....Big Shocker.  I couldn’t really come up with answers to those questions.  I really don’t read many books as I work 6 days a week, have two small children & many idle hobbies I delve into when I can’t sleep at night.  I go to church & sing in the choir on Sunday mornings before I have to bee-line it into work.  I try not to miss choir practice and always try to lend a helping hand to others in need.  I don’t have time for TV and I love to sing in the car.  I work out 5 days per week and eat very clean..physically.  Life’s busy but it’s ok.  Or is it?  Why couldn’t I answer question #1 then.  Is anyone or anything really influencing me negatively?  Guess not...so that must mean that I am my own worst enemy.  I am a negative influence on myself.  I do not pass blame on anybody or anything else but myself.  Thus the big shocker.  So “Who am I allowing to influence my thoughts?”.  Myself.  Now that’s pitiful.  I am a Christian but I am human.  Why in the world would I not the power of the Divine have more influence over me than my own stupid self.  Questions #2 & #3 are relative to #1 so they were shot also.  Now for question #4.  How much of what I do take in (of whatever is on the Menu for the week) is nutritious for me?  I feel like somebody filling out a Weight Watchers Questionnaire.  Yes I know what got me into this prediciment but I don’t want to fess up because then I’d have to give up my vices.  I have enough nutrition to blow on fumes I guess.  I spend more time worrying about how nutritious my next meal is for my body and not worrying enough about the nutrition of the next meal for my soul.  I don’t feed my soul 3 meals per day.  If I physically ate like I soulfully ate, I’d be a bag of bones right about now.  Now if that doesn’t shock you into next week nothing will.  Except for...who am I influencing?  Wow.  That’s enough to make me cry.  I would never intentionally hurt anyone, it’s the subconscious influence that is passed like the flu germ...silently.  I feel totally oblivious at this point.  I worked for a man once that said “If you have a complaint you’d better have a solution”.  I do have a complaint now.  I’m starving my own soul and therefore inflicting malnutrition on those around me.  My solution to this complaint is to start feeding my soul every time I feed my mouth.  When I sit down to a meal, I need to bring a good book with me and eat with my mouth and eyes at the same time.  That should then fix the flu bug epidemic as well.  I will hopefully be infectious in a “Better” way!

i understand how u are feeling..... i feel as though that is very surprising coming from me a 16 year old. but i understand.

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